How Long do I Have to Play a Game Before I Can Review It?

“I’m not a professional critic. I don’t get paid to write about video games, yet I write at least one article per week about games, mostly because I enjoy doing so. But I’m not actually legally obligated in any way to sit down at a computer and write.

This fact became quite important to me a few days ago after I played about 90 minutes of Party Hard. I really, really don’t like Party Hard. I think it’s a badly designed game on nearly every dimension. It’s ugly, confusing, boring, shallow, and has some of the worst voice acting I’ve ever heard in a video game. I came to this realization after a mere hour and a half of gameplay. In fact, I was so confident in my understanding of the game, that I thought I could write a standard 1,500 word analysis of Party Hard right then and there.

The problem was that I had only reached the third out of twelve levels in the game, and I didn’t want to keep playing. It wasn’t worth it. Party Hard is a slog for me to get through. Everyone knows that sense of irritation which builds up in your mind when you try to force yourself to do something you don’t want to. Fortunately, I have mostly left that feeling behind in my life since I graduated high school, but it occasionally flares up again when I’m forced by circumstance to do menial, pointless tasks at someone else’s behest. Well, playing Party Hard for more than ten minutes straight makes the part of my mind which produces that feeling go berserk and force me to quit out to do literally anything else…”


Read the rest of the article at the Gaming Rebellion:

How Long do I Have to Play a Game Before I Can Review It?


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